My mate flew out for the England women’s quarter-final but a mix up with tickets meant he couldn’t get in the stadium and had to watch it a few miles away at a fan park. On the bright side he did manage to catch some of Sweden’s missed penalties. The Lionesses are through to the semifinals of the Euros. And they did so despite a penalty shootout that featured worse spot kicks than the one taken by Diana Ross at the opening ceremony of the 1994 World Cup . Out of 14 penalties only five were scored. There were more misses than in a beauty pageant. It was ugly but it doesn’t matter a jot as Sarina Weigman’s side are a step closer to another title. And if they’re lucky they’ll follow in President Donald Trump ’s footsteps and win a football winners’ medal. The crazy US President got carried away when handing over the World Club Trophy that he stayed with the players for their celebrations. Don “Terry” Trump also pocketed a medal in the melee. Which he can now put alongside all those well deserved golf trophies he has won. Don’t you hate people who take credit of glory for things they had nothing to do with? It’s like Christmas , my wife hates it. All year she works long hours to buy all the presents the kids ask for. And then on Christmas Day some fat bloke with a beard gets all the credit for it. Well I suppose it’s her fault for marrying me. England players deserve all the credit for getting to the semis against Italy on Tuesday. And I reckon they can comfortably win and make it to the final. ENGLAND to win h/t and f/t - (betway) - 23/20 The news comes after Jeff Stelling roared for the Lionesses after Joey Barton branded their nerve-shredding Euro 25 quarter-final victory a ‘monstrosity’. The former Sky Sports host stepped in after ex-Manchester City and Newcastle United star Barton stuck his claws into the penalty shoot-out triumph over Sweden that took England into the semis. Sarina Wiegman’s side looked down and out as the Swedes raced into a 2-0 first half lead. Two goals in less than two minutes by Lucy Bronze and Michelle Agyemang levelled the match before England triumphed 3-2 in an edge of the seat spotkick shootout. Goalie Hannah Hampton was the hero with two penalty saves - including one hailed ‘unbelievable’ by former Lioness ‘keeper Karen Bardsley. Defending champions England now face Italy on Tuesday with their dream of winning a second successive Euros alive. But former midfielder Barton, 42, who played just once for England in 2007, wrote on X: “Is this a knockout game this monstrosity?” Stelling, 70, who presented Gillette Soccer Saturday for Sky Sports from 1994 until 2023, was quick to hit back. He wrote: “Bet you haven't turned off though Joey? The shot appeared to hit the back of the net." Barton later responded: “I did Jeff. That's how bad it was. You can't tell me that's proper football. It's pure cosplay nonsense…And YOU know it!” I WENT to the Royal Albert Hall last night and it was full of mums with pushchairs and buggies. I thought "Ah, it must be last night of the prams.” Push the boat out and gamble on EAST KILBRIDE to beat Elgin - (betfred) - EVS A PIRATE walks into a bar with a chocolate bar on his head. The bartender says, “What’s with chocolate?”The pirate says, “Arrr! I’ve got a Bounty on me head.” Find treasure with a bet on FRANCE to beat Germany in Women’s Euros - (coral) - 11/10 I HATE it when people say age is only a number. Age is clearly a word. Spread the word and punt on PORTLAND TIMBERS to beat Minnesota Utd - (Paddy Power) - 6/4 GOT up this morning and ran around the block five times. Then I got tired, so I picked up the block and put it back in the toy box. Run to the bookies to bet on IRISH FIGHTER in the 3.30pm at Newbury - (coral) - 14/1